Sita Resolves to End Her Life

Shloka 1 (sundara.28.1)

सा राक्षसेन्द्रस्य वचो निशम्य तद् रावणस्याप्रियमप्रियार्ता । सीता वितत्रास यथा वनान्ते सिंहाभिपन्ना गजराजकन्या ॥ 28.1 ॥

sā rākṣasendrasya vaco niśamya tad rāvaṇasyāpriyamapriyārtā | sītā vitatrāsa yathā vanānte siṃhābhipannā gajarājakanyā || 28.1 ||

Hearing those harsh words of the demon-king Ravana, Sita, tormented with grief, trembled with fear, like a young female elephant seized by a lion in the depths of the forest.

Shloka 2 (sundara.28.2)

सा राक्षसीमध्यगता च भीरु- र्वाग्भिर्भृशं रावणतर्जिता च । कान्तारमध्ये विजने विसृष्टा बालेव कन्या विललाप सीता ॥ 28.2 ॥

sā rākṣasīmadhyagatā ca bhīru- rvāgbhirbhṛśaṃ rāvaṇatarjitā ca | kāntāramadhye vijane visṛṣṭā bāleva kanyā vilalāpa sītā || 28.2 ||

That timid Sita, surrounded by ogresses and sorely threatened by Ravana's words, wept like a young girl abandoned alone in the depths of a wilderness.

Shloka 3 (sundara.28.3)

सत्यं बतेदं प्रवदन्ति लोके नाकालमृत्युर्भवतीति सन्तः । यत्राहमेवं परिभर्त्स्यमाना जीवामि यस्मात् क्षणमप्यपुण्या ॥ 28.3 ॥

satyaṃ batedaṃ pravadanti loke nākālamṛtyurbhavatīti santaḥ | yatrāhamevaṃ paribhartsyamānā jīvāmi yasmāt kṣaṇamapyapuṇyā || 28.3 ||

"True indeed is what the wise say in this world - that death never comes before its appointed hour - for I, though so cruelly threatened, sinful as I am, yet live on even for a single moment."

Shloka 4 (sundara.28.4)

सुखाद् विहीनं बहुदुःखपूर्ण- मिदं तु नूनं हृदयं स्थिरं मे । विदीर्यते यन्न सहस्रधाद्य वज्राहतं शृंगमिवाचलस्य ॥ 28.4 ॥

sukhād vihīnaṃ bahuduḥkhapūrṇa- midaṃ tu nūnaṃ hṛdayaṃ sthiraṃ me | vidīryate yanna sahasradhādya vajrāhataṃ śṛṃgamivācalasya || 28.4 ||

"Devoid of happiness, filled with endless sorrow, this heart of mine must surely be made of iron, that it does not this day shatter into a thousand pieces, like a mountain-peak struck by a thunderbolt."

Shloka 5 (sundara.28.5)

नैवास्ति नूनं मम दोषमत्र वध्याहमस्याप्रियदर्शनस्य । भावं न चास्याहमनुप्रदातु- मलं द्विजो मन्त्रमिवाद्विजाय ॥ 28.5 ॥

naivāsti nūnaṃ mama doṣamatra vadhyāhamasyāpriyadarśanasya | bhāvaṃ na cāsyāhamanupradātu- malaṃ dvijo mantramivādvijāya || 28.5 ||

"Surely there is no fault of mine in this matter, though I stand condemned to death by this hateful-looking one; nor am I able to give him my affection, any more than a brahmin would impart a sacred mantra to one not twice-born."

Shloka 6 (sundara.28.6)

तस्मिन्ननागच्छति लोकनाथे गर्भस्थजन्तोरिव शल्यकृन्तः । नूनं ममांगान्यचिरादनार्यः शस्त्रैः शितैश्छेत्स्यति राक्षसेन्द्रः ॥ 28.6 ॥

tasminnanāgacchati lokanāthe garbhasthajantoriva śalyakṛntaḥ | nūnaṃ mamāṃgānyacirādanāryaḥ śastraiḥ śitaiśchetsyati rākṣasendraḥ || 28.6 ||

"If that lord of the world does not come, then, like a surgeon cutting apart a lifeless creature still in the womb, this base demon-king will soon hack my limbs apart with his sharpened weapons."

Shloka 7 (sundara.28.7)

दुःखं बतेदं ननु दुःखिताया मासौ चिरायाभिगमिष्यतो द्वौ । बद्धस्य वध्यस्य यथा निशान्ते राजोपरोधादिव तस्करस्य ॥ 28.7 ॥

duḥkhaṃ batedaṃ nanu duḥkhitāyā māsau cirāyābhigamiṣyato dvau | baddhasya vadhyasya yathā niśānte rājoparodhādiva taskarasya || 28.7 ||

"How painful indeed - for me in my grief, these two remaining months will pass as slowly as the final night for a bound thief awaiting execution by a king's decree."

Shloka 8 (sundara.28.8)

हा राम हा लक्ष्मण हा सुमित्रे हा राममातः सह मे जनन्यः । एषा विपद्याम्यहमल्पभाग्या महार्णवे नौरिव मूढवाता ॥ 28.8 ॥

hā rāma hā lakṣmaṇa hā sumitre hā rāmamātaḥ saha me jananyaḥ | eṣā vipadyāmyahamalpabhāgyā mahārṇave nauriva mūḍhavātā || 28.8 ||

"O Rama! O Lakshmana! O Sumitra! O mother of Rama, and my own mother too! Here am I, of little fortune, about to perish, like a ship driven astray by fierce winds upon the mighty ocean."

Shloka 9 (sundara.28.9)

तरस्विनौ धारयता मृगस्य सत्त्वेन रूपं मनुजेन्द्रपुत्रौ । नूनं विशस्तौ मम कारणात् तौ सिंहर्षभौ द्वाविव वैद्युतेन ॥ 28.9 ॥

tarasvinau dhārayatā mṛgasya sattvena rūpaṃ manujendraputrau | nūnaṃ viśastau mama kāraṇāt tau siṃharṣabhau dvāviva vaidyutena || 28.9 ||

"Surely those two swift princes, sons of the lord of men, were slain for my sake by that being who assumed the form of a deer - like two lion-like heroes struck down by a thunderbolt."

Shloka 10 (sundara.28.10)

नूनं स कालो मृगरूपधारी मामल्पभाग्यां लुलुभे तदानीम् । यत्रार्यपुत्रौ विससर्ज मूढा रामानुजं लक्ष्मणपूर्वजं च ॥ 28.10 ॥

nūnaṃ sa kālo mṛgarūpadhārī māmalpabhāgyāṃ lulubhe tadānīm | yatrāryaputrau visasarja mūḍhā rāmānujaṃ lakṣmaṇapūrvajaṃ ca || 28.10 ||

"Surely it was Death itself, taking the form of that deer, which then lured me, unfortunate as I am - I, foolish woman, who sent forth both the noble prince and his younger brother, Lakshmana."

Shloka 11 (sundara.28.11)

हा राम सत्यव्रत दीर्घबाहो हा पूर्णचन्द्रप्रतिमानवक्त्र । हा जीवलोकस्य हितः प्रियश्च वध्यां न मां वेत्सि हि राक्षसानाम् ॥ 28.11 ॥

hā rāma satyavrata dīrghabāho hā pūrṇacandrapratimānavaktra | hā jīvalokasya hitaḥ priyaśca vadhyāṃ na māṃ vetsi hi rākṣasānām || 28.11 ||

"O Rama, true to your vows, O long-armed one! O you whose face resembles the full moon! O well-wisher and beloved of every living being - you do not even know that I now stand condemned to death by these demons!"

Shloka 12 (sundara.28.12)

अनन्यदेवत्वमियं क्षमा च भूमौ च शय्या नियमश्च धर्मे । पतिव्रतात्वं विफलं ममेदं कृतं कृतघ्नेष्विव मानुषाणाम् ॥ 28.12 ॥

ananyadevatvamiyaṃ kṣamā ca bhūmau ca śayyā niyamaśca dharme | pativratātvaṃ viphalaṃ mamedaṃ kṛtaṃ kṛtaghneṣviva mānuṣāṇām || 28.12 ||

"This worship of no other god but you, this patience, this sleeping upon the bare ground, this discipline in righteousness - all this devotion of a faithful wife has gone to waste, like a good deed done for the ungrateful."

Shloka 13 (sundara.28.13)

मोघो हि धर्मश्चरितो ममायं तथैकपत्नीत्वमिदं निरर्थकम् । या त्वां न पश्यामि कृशा विवर्णा हीना त्वया संगमने निराशा ॥ 28.13 ॥

mogho hi dharmaścarito mamāyaṃ tathaikapatnītvamidaṃ nirarthakam | yā tvāṃ na paśyāmi kṛśā vivarṇā hīnā tvayā saṃgamane nirāśā || 28.13 ||

"This righteousness I have practiced has indeed proved fruitless, and this my devotion as a single-hearted wife has become meaningless - I who, wasted and pale, no longer see you, and who, bereft of you, have lost all hope of ever meeting you again."

Shloka 14 (sundara.28.14)

पितुर्निदेशं नियमेन कृत्वा वनान्निवृत्तश्चरितव्रतश्च । स्त्रीभिस्तु मन्ये विपुलेक्षणाभिः संरंस्यसे वीतभयः कृतार्थः ॥ 28.14 ॥

piturnideśaṃ niyamena kṛtvā vanānnivṛttaścaritavrataśca | strībhistu manye vipulekṣaṇābhiḥ saṃraṃsyase vītabhayaḥ kṛtārthaḥ || 28.14 ||

"Having faithfully carried out your father's command and completed your vow, you will return from the forest, and I think you shall then enjoy yourself, free of fear and your purpose fulfilled, with wide-eyed women."

Shloka 15 (sundara.28.15)

अहं तु राम त्वयि जातकामा चिरं विनाशाय निबद्धभावा । मोघं चरित्वाथ तपो व्रतं च त्यक्ष्यामि धिग्जीवितमल्पभाग्याम् ॥ 28.15 ॥

ahaṃ tu rāma tvayi jātakāmā ciraṃ vināśāya nibaddhabhāvā | moghaṃ caritvātha tapo vrataṃ ca tyakṣyāmi dhigjīvitamalpabhāgyām || 28.15 ||

"But as for me, O Rama, having long conceived love for you, my heart bound fast only for its own ruin, having practiced austerity and vows all in vain, I shall now give up this life - shame upon my ill-fated existence!"

Shloka 16 (sundara.28.16)

संजीवितं क्षिप्रमहं त्यजेयं विषेण शस्त्रेण शितेन वापि । विषस्य दाता न तु मेऽस्ति कश्चि- च्छस्त्रस्य वा वेश्मनि राक्षसस्य ॥ 28.16 ॥

saṃjīvitaṃ kṣipramahaṃ tyajeyaṃ viṣeṇa śastreṇa śitena vāpi | viṣasya dātā na tu me'sti kaści- cchastrasya vā veśmani rākṣasasya || 28.16 ||

"I would gladly give up this life at once, by poison or by a sharpened weapon - but here in the house of this demon, there is no one to give me either poison or a weapon."

Shloka 17 (sundara.28.17)

इतीव देवी बहुधा विलप्य सर्वात्मना राममनुस्मरन्ती प्रवेपमाना परिशुष्कवक्त्रा नगोत्तमं पुष्पितमाससाद ॥ 28.17 ॥

itīva devī bahudhā vilapya sarvātmanā rāmamanusmarantī pravepamānā pariśuṣkavaktrā nagottamaṃ puṣpitamāsasāda || 28.17 ||

Having thus lamented in many ways, that noble lady, remembering Rama with her whole being, trembling, her face parched with grief, drew near to an excellent tree in full bloom.

Shloka 18 (sundara.28.18)

शोकाभितप्ता बहुधा विचिन्त्य सीताथ वेणीग्रथनं गृहीत्वा । उद्बद्ध्य वेण्युद्ग्रथनेन शीघ्र- महं गमिष्यामि यमस्य मूलम् ॥ 28.18 ॥

śokābhitaptā bahudhā vicintya sītātha veṇīgrathanaṃ gṛhītvā | udbaddhya veṇyudgrathanena śīghra- mahaṃ gamiṣyāmi yamasya mūlam || 28.18 ||

Consumed with grief, Sita, pondering long in many ways, took hold of the braided plait of her hair, thinking: "By tying it fast about my neck, I shall swiftly go to the abode of Yama."

Shloka 19 (sundara.28.19)

उपस्थिता सा मृदुसर्वगात्री शाखां गृहीत्वा च नगस्य तस्य । तस्यास्तु रामं परिचिन्तयन्त्या रामानुजं स्वं च कुलं शुभांग्याः ॥ 28.19 ॥

upasthitā sā mṛdusarvagātrī śākhāṃ gṛhītvā ca nagasya tasya | tasyāstu rāmaṃ paricintayantyā rāmānujaṃ svaṃ ca kulaṃ śubhāṃgyāḥ || 28.19 ||

So that lady of soft and delicate limbs took hold of a branch of that tree and stood there; and as she, of lovely form, thought deeply of Rama, of his younger brother, and of her own lineage,

Shloka 20 (sundara.28.20)

तस्या विशोकानि तदा बहूनि धैर्यार्जितानि प्रवराणि लोके । प्रादुर्निमित्तानि तदा बभूवुः पुरापि सिद्धान्युपलक्षितानि ॥ 28.20 ॥

tasyā viśokāni tadā bahūni dhairyārjitāni pravarāṇi loke | prādurnimittāni tadā babhūvuḥ purāpi siddhānyupalakṣitāni || 28.20 ||

then there appeared upon her many auspicious omens, free of any occasion for sorrow, bestowing courage, excellent, of the kind known in this world to have always proved true before.